Florida Atlantic University's first student-run news source.


Florida Atlantic University's first student-run news source.


Florida Atlantic University's first student-run news source.


You almost pulled it off

You know those edge-of-your-seat moments in movies when the hero is about to bite the

bullet? Or when the crazy villain is moments away from pulling off his master plan?

Those plans never quite work out. The hero ends up thwarting the villain, unless he shows up in a sequel where the entire process will repeat itself.

To pay homage to the hard work that went into these dastardly plots, here is the UP’s list of the top 10 evil plans that almost worked:


01. The Death Star: Star Wars IV, V, VI

The Death Star, the evil plan to top all evil plans. Why? Because Emperor Palpatine pulled enough resources to build a freakin’ spaceship planet … two of them. The Death Star was literally a star of death— a giant space station that shot a giant laser beam, which caused entire planets to explode. If it weren’t for that pesky rebel alliance, he would have gotten away with it, too.

02. Skynet’s Terminators: Terminator Series

A tale as old as time: Man creates national defense robots, robots become intelligent, robots annihilate man in a massive worldwide nuclear war. If it weren’t for John Connor and the resistance, Skynet would have ruled earth. Connor was such a big threat that they sent three different Terminators to three different points in time to ensure that he dies. Even then they couldn’t pull it off.

03. Aliens destroying Earth: Independence Day

This is a scenario that has been played out in movies since the golden age of the sci-fi flick in the ’50s. But none did it better than the aliens from Independence Day. An organized global attack on every major city worldwide was a good plan to destroy humanity, but you’d better check up on what happened with your recon ship 40 years ago. It may just come back to screw up your plans.

04. Voldemort and the Death Eaters: Harry Potter Series

Tom Riddle was a bad seed. And when he went completely postal on a wizard-killing rampage he was on the cusp of complete domination. If only it weren’t for a baby named Harry Potter who would continue to be a thorn in his side for the next 17 years. And for all that time He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named would beg the question “What is love?”

05.Dr. Rene Belloq opening the ark: Indiana Jones – Raiders of the Lost Ark

After stealing the Ark from Indiana Jones, Belloq and the Nazis believed they would have complete power over the world once they opened it. It was no secret that Belloq was a big rival of Indy. He constantly stole treasures that rightly belonged to Jones — or a museum. Little did Belloq and the Nazis know that opening the Ark would melt their faces and cause Belloq to explode. Oops.

06. Victor stealing the moon: Despicable Me

Although it is actually Gru who steals the moon, Victor is the evildoer who kidnaps Gru’s daughters and pilfers the shrunken moon from Gru. But what shrinks must grow back, and the moon eventually grew inside Victor’s ship, foiling his misguided plan.

07. Auric Goldfinger’s gold smuggling operation: Goldfinger

Goldfinger has an obsession with gold, hence the name. So much so that he painted disobedient women with gold to kill them by skin suffocation. But his master plan was to smuggle gold out of several countries by disguising it as parts of his Rolls Royce. If it weren’t for James Bond and the “Grand Slam” sting operation, Goldfinger would have been the world’s richest man.

08. Dr. Evil holding the world ransom: Austin Powers – The Spy Who Shagged Me

A plan to intercept a nuclear warhead in transit from a breakaway Russian republic to the United Nations and hold the world ransom for $1 million sounds like a foolproof plan. But when Austin Powers is on the case, you can forget it. Powers managed to best Dr. Evil’s fembots with a striptease, and this in turn allowed him to get into the room where the Doomsday device resided. However, it was nice to see that Dr. Evil finally got his wish of sharks with laser beams on their heads in Goldmember.

09. Jafar taking over Agraba: Aladdin

Jafar successfully took over Agrabah but, like most villains, got too greedy. The Genie turned Jafar into the most powerful genie in the universe. However, Aladdin bested him by making him a slave to the genie pot, and thus Agrabah  was saved. Not sure how Jasmine’s father came to trust a guy with a glowing red eye snake scepter. Never trust a man with a scepter.

10. Pinky and the Brain’s world domination: Pinky and the Brain

Every night these genetically enhanced lab rats were bent on world domination. But every night they failed pretty miserably or ended up getting into some sort of strange predicament. But you’re a lab rat with a brain, what else do you have to do? Running on the wheel and cheese mazes 24/7 gets a little redundant. Then again so was the show. However, their persistence was impeccable and, had the network given them enough seasons, they may have very well ruled the world.

Leave a Comment
More to Discover

Comments (0)

Do you have something to say? Submit your comments below
All UNIVERSITY PRESS Picks Reader Picks Sort: Newest

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *