Student Relationships.

People are content to replace relationships, based on affection and sex and well intentioned pleasantries, with concern over various topics in the news and institutions of thought to propel their own reserved impulses. I fall privy to this on a constant basis. Instead of looking over at the pretty girl across from me and striking up a flaming conversation, which could smolder into boring embers or erupt into interesting passionate flames, I instead read about racist immigration vigilantes and their support for armed sentry keeping at the Arizona border. This focuses the extent of my anger and lust based impulses into one scapegoat, rather than having to run some emotional gamut with another human being not three feet across a table from me. In fact, this anxiety has positioned itself so greatly upon my shoulders, I almost wish for partitions to separate these computer consoles from each other, much like a cubicle configuration found in office buildings across the world. So very depressing and isolating, yet holding the possibility for so many unexplored avenues of discussion. Well then, was it my reluctant upbringing that produced this repression, or an unconcern for any tangible new change in my life that I victimize myself to? Dissected enough, it reveals a kind of emotional terrorism that is inflicted upon those that I deprive of communication. This just makes me lock myself up even tighter, I think. What a terrible infliction to carry. But in it, I think the individual is created, as isolation allows introspection, and a lot of self-loving. It’s still rather egotistical to share myself with only myself and not everybody at all times, like some kind of super-energized celebrity, with promises of eternal life and answers to any question of existence at the ready, along with the ability to seduce and hypnotize. Perhaps this is what human interaction has evolved into, a bloated, conceited, masturbatory effect, written on the brains of humans exposed to the gimme-gimme-gimme of modern life. Troubling and exciting at all times, as everyone is now considered ‘special’ and ‘interesting’, yet completely unapproachable.

-James Day-